Puddles

Me, very late at night: "Zzzz...."
Dorian, very late at night: "Zzzz...DON'T FORGET YOUR UMBRELLA!"
Me: O_O
Dorian: "It's filled with puddles."

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This one from this morning is my doing, I'm afraid.

Me: "I had a weird dream."
Dorian: "Hmm?"
"The king from The Last Unicorn, I can't remember his name, he was this wizard, but really insanely powerful, and I wandered into his woods and he cursed me and then he came back...it was all done in Ralph Bakshi style animation...he was still voiced by Christopher Lee...I can't remember the name of the king, though...that's really going to bother me..."
"Hmm."

Several minutes...okay, like, half an hour passed as I sat and mulled over it. The Last Unicorn was my favorite movie growing up, and one of my favorite books. I've seen it more times than I can count, I can recite most of the dialog from memory. Not being able to remember the name of the antagonist was really bothering me. As I sat and thought about it, I failed to notice Dorian had fallen back to sleep.

Half an hour later...

Me: "HAGGARD!"
(Dorian, alarmed and jerking awake): "Ahh! Wha? Wha?!"
"The king's name is Haggard."
"Oh...that's...well, I'm glad you figured that out."
"I'm sorry, you were sleeping again, weren't you?"
(Dejectedly) "Yes. I was...asleep."

My bad.

Scorpio

Dorian and I were out stargazing (as best one can in a small city) on our balcony.

"Is that Scorpio?...Wait, it turns out three of those are satellites."

Rome is a great series.

I'm not sure if he was wholly awake for this one.

"I'm going to summarize my dream for you. Witches are bad news, you're best just to avoid them. And the day you get out of jail is a bad time to go and pick up your ex-girlfriend's mother. Even if she is Atia of the Juliii."

We've all had that one

"I had a nightmare."
"I'm sorry, love."
"I did graduate, right?"
"Yes."
"Good. I'm not ready for a French exam."

Shalom

Dorian, on why he didn't end up in his intended line of work:

"Give me ten years as a rabbi and see what I do to the Jewish faith."

Paper Speculum

Dorian had a few drinks tonight. As he left the room, indignant that we were not all so fascinated with his discovery that, when you put spent paper towel tubes on your fingers, "it looks kind of like a speculum, see, duck bill, checkin' you out inside," he said the following:

"No, no, I get it. I can't do anything right. I get it. I can't make you happy with paper tubes."