I was reading passages from The Beastiary aloud to entertain the group tonight, and Dorian, being Dorian, fell asleep on the couch.
Me: "Hang on, you guys need to hear 'Elephant.'"
(I flip through the pages, looking for the entry. Dorian snores loudly.)
Me: "...Where's 'Elephant?"
Dorian: "It's under, 'P,' for 'Porn.'...Aaah! No, no, no, Sascha! Put it down!"
(My close-friend-like-a-sister is named Sascha.)